What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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What's long hard and black A drain pipe

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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what do you call a black woman pregnant with twins? A woman who has a loving husband who she wanted to have children with so when they had sex, 2 of his sperm fertilized the egg so now she gets to raise two children which she is looking forward to, but she also knows it will be alot of work.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

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What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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Pope: how to help the unfortunate people my fellow Christians? Christians: We should give donations and a lot of support. What we always do. Pope: and i shall wear this golden hat, sit on a high quality super expensive chair, this rope with gold attached to the decorations, and wave my golden staff as you help these poor innocent children. Christians: yes...that... Pope: P.S: and live in an expensive church with many children alone.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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