What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

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"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops