Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

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Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

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A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops