A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

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What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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what do you say to a woman on her rags? nothing.try and ignore it.you didn't hear this from me and we never talked.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could DO YO MOMM!!!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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What does it mean when somebody is Jewish? They eat palahuardo por sinquevos for breakfast. Qua.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

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what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

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What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

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What did the gay man see when he looked out the window? A UPS truck that was shipping a monkey

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

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What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops