so a blind man walks into a bar, then a chair, then a table.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

Did you know that Claire Seiter likes to drinkapplseiter? No. Oh well she does..

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

Whats 1+1? window!

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 had paranoia.

Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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