Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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Dick Cheney That's the joke

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How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

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How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

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Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

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yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

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What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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whats the differnce between madalin macan and batman?...batman returns

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Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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