What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

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What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

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Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

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Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

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What did michael J. Fox say when someone asked him to play catch? "sorry, I'm busy".

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How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

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why do anti jokes suck???? Because CC is Jewish and rapes orphan squirrels EJ

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how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he felt like it.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

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In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

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What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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