What do you call a mexican sleeping in a car tired.

there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

little billy has 50 chocolete bars, he eats 45 of them. what does he have now? diabetes, little billy has diabetes

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

I don't hate you because you're fat. You're fat because I hate you

Q: How many dead people does it take to change a light bulb? A: Trick question...i have sex with them in the dark

Knock Knock! Who's there? No-one No-one who? .......

Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

Hello

Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

johann grayson being liked

DANA

whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

God is religiously proven to be real

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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