They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

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An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

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What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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