A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

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why did the man fall? cuz he jumped from a building

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Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist bastard..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

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A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops