Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

What's 1+1? 69.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

Who is big and stupid My brother

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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