Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops