Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops