Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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69, Is funny because the numbers are backwards

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

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Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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what's funnier than the holocaust. If it happened again.

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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