What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane ? - a pilot.

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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What do you call a white man takeing orders from a black man? Batman and robin

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops