what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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Why did the black person jump the fences? because he was in a relay race.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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