Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a mexican sleeping in a car tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Once upon a time, there was boy. I saw this boy. So I sat on him.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +20

whats red and looks like a bucket a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket a red bucket in diguise

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Pandas Everywhere!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What was the woman doing in the kitchen? Investigating a murder..

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Rose's Are Red Violet's are Blue You Should Be In A Zoo Dont Worry Ill Be There Too But I Wont Be In A Cage With You Ill Be Laughing At You.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. Neither of the muffins say anything because muffins can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the convicted child molester say to the little girl? Nothing, they cut his tongue out in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: I don't know, he didn't tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a naked black person? A black guy

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops