A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

AROUND

Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

A man walks into a bar. Ow!

What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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