Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

wanna hear a joke? me niether.

A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'Why the long face?' The horse replies 'I've got AIDS.'

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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