Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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