You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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star wars kid

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A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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