so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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69.

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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