What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' That's fantastic because Peter Piper was paralyzed and the doctors said he would never be able tomove is arms or legs again, and there he is picking a peck of pickled peppers. I applaud you Peter Piper.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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My black friend love grape soda and koolaid, with his fried chicken, and i dont think its racist cuz i also enjoy the same things at times

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What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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Who moved faster? The snail or the blind man? The blind man until he ran into the road and got hit by a bus.

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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9/11 my birthday

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And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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