Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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