What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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hi

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

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All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

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What did the college student do during her Spring Break in Mexico? We're not sure, she never came back.

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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