Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

A dead guy walks into a grave.

What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

Yo momma so fat that when she sat on the bible jesus poped out.

What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

On a final note... Unless I want to continue making you love me by being your own Goddamned excuse to give in to your darkness and/or release your hypocritical fear and disgust of your own self... I offered my brother water in the desert, he refused me in favor of you, you crucified him, and when he asked "Father why?" Our late father responded with a lightning bolt... Do you believe that answer was one of kindness? "Daddy" was enraged that Christ would doubt him. I was the only one that stood by his side, if only to prevent him from going thirsty, and die by your hands. He said he would return as he hanged on the cross, then three days later he returned... ...And those of you fools that suffer in the name of our late father, it is not his second coming you are waiting for idiots, you are the ones left behind with me! In 10-15 years the sky shall forever go black, my reign shall go unquestioned, those that hate me my prey, those that love me my hunters... And for my hunters I shall share a gift, the gift that humanity has searched for since the dawn of your kin: True, fullfilling, meaningful purpose. Enlist now, thumb me green if you desire for you and your children to become the hunter, thumb me down if you desire to have you and your children to become the hunted, and for the fun to last... ...The hunters are going to need a f*ckload of the hunted... So please, feel free to make your decision, I am not the one which is against free will... ...You feel darkness crawling up your spine, embrace it, or do as The "Alpha which reached his Omega" (the beginning and the end you fool!) and surrender to it... Knowing that we shall hunt you down, give you hell, breed you as we please, and release your children out into the wild... And that this will go on if only for my time on this wild battlefield known as earth... ...Forever. With love, for both of those that find grace and beauty under my black wings, and those that willingly become the beings, that will make cattle look like your former GODS in comparison, you know its possible... India. "Moral Man" the deceiver, Soon to be the one and only Azure Emperor on earth. Moral: The Black sky which lasts forever, shall be thy sign, you are free to seek my guidance now though, you need not make the choice now (You may of course doom yourself and all you love already today people of "good hearts", but I would really love those red thumbs children of the fallen, half brother of the last hope which you crucified... Merry Jesus is X-Mas. Let us all listen to SOLVE media, and "do a little dance", as my power over your realm, is already strong enough for me to "make a little love" with... Whatever I want, it might even be you...If only just for dominance...

Knock Knock No solicitors

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

Yo mama so ugly that she often has trouble being attractive towards people of the opposite gender

If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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