Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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How do you make a dentist cry? Kill all his family.

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what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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Knock Knock Who's there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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