A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

Q: What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? A: I don't know; I was too busy trying to find my camera.

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

What did the fish say when he hit the wall? A. Dam B. He Charlie I found the wall C. Both Well he didn't say both but he could have said A or B but it wouldn't make sense for him to say both.

If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

What's the difference between a person who can differentiate an anti-joke from a joke and one who cannot? Other than being able to tell the difference between the two types of humour, it is impossible to tell, as no further information is given.

Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...