How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh my gosh, my yard is on fire!!!

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You.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

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What do you call a person trying to save his interprise from partaking in a financial collapse by binging on alcohal? An alcoholic.

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When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

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Why was Billy sad? An evil clown hit him with an Axe.

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

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The chicken crossed the road.

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

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Yo Momma is so ugly she probably doesn't have any friends.

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What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

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whats bigger than a 4 school bus pile up? genocide.

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Why did a hipster walks into a health food store? To buy some healthy food.

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why did abby get fired? cause she showed allie anti joke.com!!! :0

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

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A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

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Why did the homosexual rapist walk into the pizza shop? Because he was hungry after a long day of raping little boys.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

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james schmitt whats your last name

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops