I like to eat.

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

Potato salad

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

Goat balls.

Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

What do you call a group of asians? China.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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