Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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alert("Hello");

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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