A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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