Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

Q: What's one thing that 5 out of 6 people always agree on? A: Gang Rape

A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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