What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

hi

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing, because they clearly never made contact with each other, owing to the fact that Osama was born approximately 13 years after Hitler had committed suicide

2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

Nero, you got followers, people that believe in you, ironically maybe a lot less now, that I have been giving them the fake illusion that I am you, why did you never reveal your true self? Is there something wrong with you physically? Something you fear being judged upon? I love and admire your work, and you to be honest, I know you are married and all, but my heart has chosen its path, it cant be helped really, believe me, I have tried. Dont lose hope in yourself, sometimes you have to accept that you are smarter, wiser, more compassionate and vulnerable than the rest, allowing yourself to be a vulnerable person, also shows how strong you are, if you shut it all away in order to become "strong", you know you end up alone and forgotten. I understand why someone such as you loses hope in humanity, but as long as you hold into the hope of you having the wisdom and courage required to stand on your own with pride rather than shame of your strength and individuality as a human being, something ever rarer I concur, then you have the right to consider yourself greater rather than some arrogant jackass, believe me, I know the man I am speaking about.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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