Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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If life gives you lemonade.

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Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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12 in general

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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What is white and black and red all over.

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What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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