An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

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A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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Yes

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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I? Everett

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

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What do you call an amazing person Good

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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