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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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