Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

guess what? bannanas

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

your momma is so fat she has diabetes

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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