Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops