Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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Gary: Stick your tongue out and say "I live in a pirate ship" Bruce: *sticks tongue out* "I lib inna pile of shiiit."

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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Q: What do you call an exact duplicate of Homer Simpson who's been enhanced with numerous special powers and a strength-boosting inducer among other beneficial additions? A: A mobidly overweigth individual who hasn't realized what the phrase, "Go on a diet", even denotes/implies.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

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how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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NEVER

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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So i was writing a letter to my girlfriend on valentines day right ? So this is how it goes . " hey lisa happy volentines day!" my black friend walks up to me and says" its a mightyfine day out! " The moral of the story is... Tomatoes can't fly planes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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