A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

Women's rights

Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a mammal.

Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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