Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

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A lion and a cheetah raced each other and the cheetah won Lion: "man you're a cheetah!" Cheetah: "no you're lion!" Then the cheetah tears off the lions head and feeds it to their babies

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What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

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What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops