one of the idiot

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How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

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pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

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What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Wanna hear a riddle? Womens rights

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

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Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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So a bar walks into a man...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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