My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

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What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

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Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

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how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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