Im taking a shit right now.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two baby seals walk into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

thumb_up thumb_down -5

jack and jill went up a hill so jack could lick jills candy but jack got a shock and a mouth full of C O C K cause jill's real name was randy... ... and joe diragi liked it

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

thumb_up thumb_down -5

:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops