When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

Justin beiber comment if u get it

69...you know how awkward this is now...

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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