i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She was shot Knock knock Who's there? Sally Aren't you dead? Oh yeah K Well imma go be dead now Have fun K

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what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

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Goat balls.

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A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

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How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

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What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

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How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

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What do you get when you cross a porcupine with party balloons? Unhappy kids

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What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

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What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

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why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

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Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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Why did the White guy wanna be Black? He liked basketball.

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A dwarf walks under a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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