How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

What do you call an aircraft piloted by a Muslim extremist? The aircraft's brand name followed by its model number, in all likelihood.

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

james schmitt whats your last name

Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

if this joke was a potato, it would be a good potato

What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

A basket full of puppies can do anything, except put out a fire.

Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

YO mama so stupid, when she got hit by a bus she said WHO THREW THAF ROCK AT ME.

Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

Two jews walk into a bar. They laugh over a beer and leave

Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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