Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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