Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

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Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because numbers, like people, are afraid of all things bigger than themselves

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

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They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

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How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

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And now a word from our sponsors

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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snowglobe

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

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How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

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A guy walks into a bar

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops