What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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