Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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Hey Shea

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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