Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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"I see" said the blind man to the deaf man... On the phone

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

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It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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